Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Trust the Bed - My Holiday Analogy

I stayed at my parents house for Christmas this year.  The house they live in was not my childhood home so I no longer have a dedicated room.  This year I was to stay in the downstairs room on a daybed they just purchased.   It's a new bed, decent mattress.  It creaks a bit and the mattress tends to slip off the edge of the frame a few times during the night.
 
I never stayed on it before.
 
The relative rickety-ness of the bed left me a little tense.  All night I was poised to catch myself were the bed to collapse.  I moved cautiously, never quite falling into a deep sleep.
 
The first night I really didn't get much rest.
 
The second night was much the same.
 
By the third night I realized I was being ridiculous.  If the bed fell I would get hurt whether or not I was fast asleep.  So I made a decision to 'trust the bed' and you know what?  The bed didn't collapse and and I slept just fine.
 
In my romantic life, I am cautious.  I am poised to catch myself were things to collapse.  I move cautiously, never quite allowing myself to trust......