The Sinister

A close friend of mine recently came out to his family.  During the build up to this event I tried to be helpful by coming up with another strange analogy.  It turns out it wasn't needed (and it was too late) but here is the hypothetical conversation:

 

Skeptical Parent: "Fine, you have gay feelings but you don't have to ACT on them."

 

Reply: "You're right.  I don't have to act on them.  But that isn't what I am talking about, I am talking about who I am."

 

SP: "You are defined by your actions.  Just don't act on your attraction to men."

 

Reply: "Can you try something for me?  Can you (my left-handed parent) fill out this post card but write it with your right hand?"

 

Parent fills out a post card, it is awkward and looks really bad.

 

Reply: "Also can you stop using your left hand when you eat?  Do you know how much easier life is for right-handed people?  Everything is designed for the right handed.  Did you know that left-handed people were once considered evil?  If fact they called it 'sinister handed'."

 

SP:  "It's not the same thing."

 

Reply: "Not exactly, no.  But this is the point, you can force yourself to use your right hand but eventually you will get frustrated and switch back to the hand that you naturally feel like using.  I can pretend to be straight like I have been doing for all of my life but it is not who I am.  That will come through.  This is not a question of actions but instead it is about something that is innate."

 

/end hypothetical conversation.

 

No conversation in the world would ever go like this but I thought it was a decent point.