The bizarre magic of childhood

I don't know why this popped back into my head but I thought it was interesting.

I believe in magic - I always have.

When I was very young, after my parents had emphatically stressed to me that I was a BOY, I had figured out how to fix things.

Magic isn't easy. The smallest thing can break the spell. I knew the magic that would free my true form and life was difficult, yet every night I tried.

How old was I? I think I knew the spell when I was 6 or 7, after I realized the nightly prayers weren't quite cutting it.

The essence was simple, the execution difficult.

When I went to sleep, I would simply forget that I was trapped as a boy. I would forget the anatomical differences as I understood them. I would forget the social role being foisted on me. As long as I didn't think about it for a whole day, the curse would be broken and I would finally be back in my real life.

I believed that for years. But it was impossible for me. I would think about the curse being lifted and my spell was broken. Someone (anyone) would talk to me and the spell was broken.

Still, wouldn't it be cool if it would have worked? Maybe it does work and we just don't know it. Maybe thousands succeed every year but our reality is reshaped by the lifting of their curse and we never knew.

Maybe I just wasn't good enough at the spell.

Oh well, leave it to me to do things the hard way.